In terms of KB training....I went into the summer training pretty steadily. I won't say I was training "hard", but I was getting in consistent jerk and snatch sets. I felt on target to hit MS numbers in Chicago (Late August)
The highlight of my summer was getting a visit from my very good friend Kukka Laakso in July. I picked her up in Chicago where we spent the weekend doing things like watching UFC 100. She came back to St. Louis with me and we spent a week training Kettlebells (and doing some drinking of course). It was probably one of the best weeks that I can remember spending with anyone. We trained, trained some more, talked training over beers and I can't really think of anything else I would have rather been doing
A week after her departure, I received the worst news of my life. My youngest sibling and only brother Jonathan had died suddenly on a Saturday morning in the parking lot of an Oklahoma City grocery store. He was 32 years old. Jonathan and our cousin John Mark had been shopping for food for a barbecue. John Mark was with him when he collapsed. I can't imagine what that was like for him. John Mark and Jonathan were very close.
Not only was I heartbroken that I had lost my only Brother, but I was especially hearbroken for my Mom and Dad and Jonathan's young wife Nikki. All of my Grandparents are gone. But, my Brother was the first in our immediate and our huge extended family to die outside of the natural order of things.
Of course, I haven't been able to assuage the guilt I feel for not spending more time with him. I moved away from Oklahoma over 13 years ago. As we both got older, we got closer in terms of our communication during the rare occasions we spent together talking. I really enjoyed our all day conversations on Thanksgiving and other holidays and I will truly miss them. Jonathan was a great Brother, Husband, Son, and a very good friend to many. (Pictured below with our Family Friend Woodard. Photo was taken 3 weeks prior to his death on the 4th of July)
Of course, I haven't been able to assuage the guilt I feel for not spending more time with him. I moved away from Oklahoma over 13 years ago. As we both got older, we got closer in terms of our communication during the rare occasions we spent together talking. I really enjoyed our all day conversations on Thanksgiving and other holidays and I will truly miss them. Jonathan was a great Brother, Husband, Son, and a very good friend to many. (Pictured below with our Family Friend Woodard. Photo was taken 3 weeks prior to his death on the 4th of July)

After my Brother's death, I had seriously considered canceling the trip to Latvia the following week. I wasn't really going to compete, but I was going to support a few folks including Kukka and my good friend Maya Garcia. After strong encouragement from my family that I should go and that Jonathan would want me to go, I made the journey.
In addition to the grieving, the trip was not without it's challenges. My flight to NYC was canceled. I had to scramble to get re-routed through Chicago, then to London. From London, I went to Helsinki. The problem was that I got to Helsinki to late to make a connection to Riga on Thursday. So, I had to go to Riga Friday morning and I just made it in time to catch the van to Ventspils.
At this point, I have to thank my very good friend Steven Khuong (Maya Garcia's husband). When my first flight had been canceled, I had touched base with him. I was about ready to bag the trip. But, he kept me focused and helped me make the hotel reservations for my unexpected stay in Helsinki.
All of the outbound challenges were worth it. When I met up with my friends like Lorraine, Kukka and Maya, I knew I had made the right decision to go. Of course, I was still very much heart broken, but I knew my friends would provide support along with a lot of humor on the trip. In the end, it proved to be very good therapy for me. The trip just reinforced the gratitude that I have for my KB friends.
So with fall here, I feel like I'm sort of starting over emotionally and somewhat physically. The cooler air will be very refreshing. I'm back to fairly consistent training. I'm doing more coaching now which has been very fulfilling and rewarding. I still struggle on certain days with the loss of my brother. I visited Oklahoma City this past weekend. While it was great visting with my family including cousins I haven't seen in years, there was definitely still a huge sense of loss and heartbreak.
I know the gratitude I have for my family and friends will continue to carry me through this difficult time along with the great memories Jonathan. I've got a new found gratitude now for my own health and the things I'm doing to improve it.
CI
